Love at the Foot of the Cross: Part 1
May the Heart of Jesus in the most Blessed Sacrament be praised, adored, and loved with grateful affection, at every moment, in all the tabernacles of the world, even until the end of time. Amen.
This is not meant to be a theological paper, but this 3-part series of posts required me to do some outside research (because I am a nerd) to further illustrate a specific topic that has been both continuously coming up in prayer and coming to life in my everyday experiences. I am a big-picture person, so organizing my thoughts and finding appropriate texts that coincide with what God has been sharing with me was a fun challenge. In future posts, I will probably be coming back to what I write here since, in my humble opinion, it is a fairly important topic.
These are the documents I will be quoting from and their respective abbreviations. You should read these in your “free time” because they will drop kick you in your soul:
BVM – “The Blessed Virgin Mary’s Role in the Celibate Priest’s Spousal and Paternal Love,” Monsignor John Cihak, Ignatius Insight (July, 2009)
DC – Deus Caritas Est (God Is Love), Pope Benedict XVI (December, 2005)
MD – Mulieris Dignitatem (On the Dignity and Vocation of Women), Pope John Paul II (August, 1988)
This mysterious topic that I have been alluding to above is the call to love through spiritual parenthood and the centrality of the Eucharist and a devotion to Mary. Yeah, not an easy topic to write about. Jesus has been lovingly demolishing me in my daily holy hour (my community has daily Exposition of the Blessed Sacrament) in regards to the reality of spiritual fatherhood and motherhood. I have encountered many people who are afraid of truly discerning a religious vocation because they have this idea that priests and nuns “give up” being fathers and mothers. This is not the case at all. Throughout this post, I will share some reflections from my own life because I used to be one of those people who was not open to discerning a religious vocation.
I was born into a cradle-Catholic family and I attended Catholic school from 6th grade – 12th grade, but I somehow missed that pretty important reality of Jesus being fully present in the Eucharist! It is definitely because of God’s grace and mercy that I can say that I cannot think of a time in my life where I did not believe in God’s existence, but that was really all I understood. I was not aware of how much God loved me until it was reflected to me through one of His priests.
About halfway through college at the University of Florida, family “stuff” began to happen and the only place where I felt any peace was at the church, which was conveniently across the street from campus. I would go to the church at random times and just sit in one of the pews and stare at the crucifix. I knew that God was out there somewhere, but I felt that He did not understand the loneliness and pain I was feeling. We do not necessarily need to use words when we pray. I cannot recall saying much to God during that time, yet, He answered my unspoken prayers and knew what I needed.
…our thoughts go to all the suffering women in the world, suffering either physically or morally. In this suffering a woman’s sensitivity plays a role, even though she often succeeds in resisting suffering better than a man. It is difficult to enumerate these sufferings; it is difficult to call them all by name. We may recall her maternal care for her children, especially when they fall sick or fall into bad ways; the death of those most dear to her; the loneliness of mothers forgotten by their grown up children; the loneliness of widows; the sufferings of women who struggle alone to make a living; and women who have been wronged or exploited. Then there are the sufferings of consciences as a result of sin, which has wounded the woman’s human or maternal dignity: the wounds of consciences which do not heal easily. With these sufferings too we must place ourselves at the foot of the Cross. (JPII, MD 19)
*St. JPII said exactly what I was feeling and was somehow led to do. The theme of the Cross with Jesus, Mary, and St. John will be recurring as I continue with my reflection*
You know those people who always happen to be at the right place at the right time? For me, this person was a priest. Just about every time I was about to cross the line from desolation to straight-up despair, this particular priest would somehow find me. It was also very hard for me to hide my sadness from this priest. I hate crying, but apparently my “puppy-eyes,” as he would call them, would always give me away. When I was found, he would know all the right things to say and do, which made me comfortable to share how I was really was. There are many personal examples I can give, but I would rather direct your heart to the image of the Good Shepherd. Here, I will even provide you with an image off of Google:
See how that sad, little lamb (probably with “puppy-eyes”) ran off and got stuck in the thornbush off of a giant cliff? Yeah, that was me. Many times. I’m sure many of you can relate. Do you also see how Jesus is risking His life to save this little lamb? He is reaching for this little lamb and the little lamb is trying to move towards Him. There is a reason why Jesus used this image in one of His most famous parables (Luke 15:1-6). There is a reason why priests are called to be shepherds.
The image of the Good Shepherd did not mean very much to me until one seemingly normal day from my undergrad years, which ended up becoming a turning point for me: I was invited to help decorate the church for Christmas over the break (since my family lived in Gainesville). When my ride came to pick me up after a few hours of decorating, I went to tell this priest that I had to go home, he then looked at me rather seriously and asked, “Am I not father enough for you?”
To be continued….
Katie McCloskey, Postulant
On January 10th, we welcomed home a new member to our growing family! Yvelyne Bernard, originally born in New York, moved to Florida when she was 15. After college, she moved to Louisiana and worked in campus ministry for 3 years. She found profound peace in our community when she came on one of our Come and See retreats, in Baton Rouge, back in October. Her official entry was to be until February 2nd, yet, even from the first week, she has fit in so well. It’s as if she has been with us for years!
From January 21st to January 22nd, we were in Washington DC, for the Vigil Mass for Life at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception and the March for Life. What a blessed experience! Truly from the time that we left to the moment we got back, God was spoiling us with His loving providence.
First, we had wanted to leave Cleveland early enough to miss the snow that was supposed to fall, but we ended up leaving a bit later; and although the snow was only about an inch on the ground, the city hadn’t salted the streets so we feared the roads being too dangerous to drive on. But praise God, as soon as we got to the main roads and highway, the roads were clear.
Once we made it to Washington, found parking near the Basilica, and tried to find seating, the Sisters got separated from the baby nuns! Thankfully, Sr. Jeanette had told everyone of a meeting spot if anyone got lost or separated. So everyone was able to regroup, after Mass, at the meeting spot. Plus it was a true blessing that we got separated: The Sisters, being so few, were able to sit right at the very front, next to the Nuncio! And the baby nuns, who went down into the lower crypt, were able to be reunited with their friends from Florida.
After the Mass, April’s generous father treated us all to dinner, at a beautiful restaurant. We had a wonderful time and enjoyed each others company and delicious food. After dinner, we made our way to the hotel for a good night’s sleep, ready for the March the next day.
Thursday morning, we went back to the Basilica for Mass. Afterwards, we were trying to figure out the best way to get to the National Mall. We decided that leaving the van at the Basilica, and taking the subway was our best option. Praise God, the nearest subway was right across the street from the Basilica, through Catholic University! As we started to board the subway, the door closed and caused April to get left behind. So we went back to rescue her, haha. It made for funny conversations the rest of the day.
The March itself lasted 4 hours. There could not be less than 800, 000 people there! What a witness to life! It was a beautiful experience. We marched along side seminarians who brought their marching band. Their joy and celebration of life was a beautiful balance to those who marched with a more solemn and sober disposition. In the end, we were all fighting for the freedom of those who cannot fight for themselves. We all were giving our lives, for the sake of others.
After the March, we made our way back the subway towards the Basilica. Our tickets had ran out of money so we were all stopped at the gate. But praise God, the official let us pass without paying. We immediately prayed three Hail Mary’s for him, in thanksgiving for his generosity.
As we made our way back to Cleveland, Sr. Isabel, who had driven the entire time there and back, became very hungry. She missed the exit she had wanted to go to but made it to a Burger King at the next exit. As soon as we walked in, a few girls asked us if we were at the March for Life. Practically everyone in that Burger King had been at the March. We all ordered something to eat and as we found somewhere to sit, a married couple paid for our meals! We thanked them many times and offered up a prayer for them. After eating, we were back on the road and made it back home around 1:30 am. The entire experience was full of blessings. May God bless all those pilgrims, all our benefactors and all those involved in bringing about the Culture of Life!
And finally, about two weeks after the March, Yvelyne, officially entered the convent on February 2nd, the Feast of the Presentation of Our Lord. Praise God, her parents were able to come. Normally, the ceremony is closed, but her parents had never visited before, so this was a perfect opportunity for them to have peace of mind and heart, to know that she is safe and happy. It was a beautiful day. We are grateful to God for blessing us with vocations to our community. We humbly pray that vocations continue to come. We have a couple of women who are visiting and others who are interested or planning on visiting. Keep these women in your prayers. May they be docile to the promptings of the Holy Spirit in their lives.
Praised be Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament, now and forever. Amen!
March for Life
On January 21st, we were blessed to be able to attend the Vigil Mass for the March for Life at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception in Washington, D.C. It is estimated that 11,000 people were in attendance. The celebration of the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass is always incredibly powerful, and it was especially moving to see all of the clergy, religious, and laity there. So many young people… we truly are the pro-life generation.
On January 22nd, we participated in the March for Life. It is a beautiful, peaceful march through our nation’s capital to celebrate the gift of life, and to show our solidarity in defending all human life, from conception to natural death. Hundreds of thousands of people of all ages and backgrounds walked together, some singing, some dancing, some praying, some chanting, some in reflective silence… but all moving as One. So many witnesses, including courageous mothers and fathers who had lost children to abortion. May we strive to build a culture of life everywhere that we go. “Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love” – Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta.
A letter to our Heavenly Father
My Beloved,
What is love? What is man that You keep him in mind, mortal man that You care for him? Who am I to have acquired Your Eucharistic Love? To have acquired You? I am seeking You. I am not far from You because of You; because of Your gifts to me: to mankind. It is by You alone that I know You are Good; that I am, in my essence, good. That You are Love, and that I can love. Love is a choice. May I always choose to love You and Your creation. May I always choose You. May I always choose Love.
I love You. Please help me to discern Your Will for me, and please accomplish it in me.
Love,
April Marie